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Chapter 3: Even evil geniuses need their diapers changed[]

"Well if it wasn't Julien then who did it?" Private asked.

At that moment the TV in the room suddenly turned on revealing a baby dolphin with a robotic eye. The mammal was wearing only a diaper and was sitting in a high tech baby carriage.

"Hello pen-gyu-ins" Blowhole greeted with a sinister smile.

"Dr. Blowhole!" Skipper shouted, his eyes narrowing at the sight of his arch enemy. "I should have known you were behind this.

"Ah Skipper how are you doing since our last encounter. I trust your bottom is feeling better now?"

"That was a dirty move putting itching powder in my diaper and you know it" he replied in an angry tone.

"I'm evil so of course I don't play fair."

"So what's your world domination plan this time?" Skipper asked immediately cutting to the chase.

"Oh I'm so glad you asked" Blowhole chuckled.

"Behold my latest and greatest invention" the baby mammal announced with a flourish before turning the camera to reveal a large ray gun like weapon, "I give you the Pacifier Ray."

"Ooo...does it make pacifiers for everyone? That would be so nice and thoughtful" Private questioned with glee, only to be slapped by Skipper for his stupid guess.

"What?...No! What it does is turn adults into babies. I plan to use the reflectors those foolish humans placed on the moon to bounce the beam back and widen its effect to cover the entire Earth, turning all the humans and animals back into helpless infants. Just imagine it Skipper an entire planet full of babies with me as their ruler."

"You fiend!" Skipper shouted not liking the mad baby dolphin's plan one bit.

"You do realize that you'll be a baby ruling other babies right?" Kowalski pointed out.

"As long as I'm the one in charge I don't really care" Blowhole answered smugly.

"Big talk coming from someone whose still in diapers" Skipper pointed out with a grin.

"Hey I may be a couple of years away from potty training but I'm still way smarter than all of you" he retorted in a huff, "Including Kowalski."

"Are not!" the tall baby penguin said sticking out his tongue.

"Am too!"

"Are not!

"Am too!"

"Are not!"

Blowhole began to get really angry with the whole back and forth thing.

However before he could put an end to it the baby dolphin suddenly let out a muffled fart as the back of his diaper bulged out, greenish fumes then rising up from the padding.

"Ugh great now look what you did, you made me make a stinky" Blowhole commented unhappily.

The penguins all shared a snicker at their enemy's unexpected messing.

"Dirty diaper detected" came a female robot voice, "Commencing changing procedure."

Two long mechanized robot hands came out of the sides of the carriage and grabbed hold of the baby dolphin.

"Wait no, I'm still on camera" Blowhole yelled trying to quickly shut off the live feed from his keypad only to be pushed onto his back by the hands.

"No, not in front of the pen-gyu-ins" he whined, blushing as he covered the front of his diaper with his little flippers.

"Well boys looks like we get to see a show" Skipper remarked grinning at the baby dolphin's embarrassment.

The hands undid the tapes and opened up Blowhole's diaper revealing the large poo he just made. The four weren't too disgusted by the sight as they were used to it given they wore them too. Removing and wrapping up the dirty diaper the hands disposed of it in the trash. Wasting no time the robotic limbs then proceeded to clean the baby dolphin's rear end with baby wipes while Blowhole squirmed and wriggled around.

Once finished the hands applied a light sprinkling of baby powder before one reached into a compartment under the carriage and pulled out a new diaper. Realizing it was almost over with Blowhole stopped fussing and allow it to put the clean set of padding on him, taping it around his waist snugly.

"Diaper change completed" the female robot voice said as the robot hands disappeared back inside the carriage.

"Finally" he growled before crawling back over to the keypad and addressing the penguins.

"Operation Goo Goo Ga Ga starts at midnight. Try and stop me if you dare" Blowhole said before the TV screen went dark.

"Well that was interesting" Skipper remarked unfazed by the time limit, placing his flippers on his hips.


He turned to look at the baby scientist only to see him babbling about something petty and not important.

"Automatic diaper changer. Why do the bad babies always get the good stuff" Kowalski complained banging his head against the wall.

"Focus Kowalski, we only have a couple of hours to stop Blowhole."

See The Babies of Madagascar for plot.